This One's for the Christians - Part Two

(If you haven't read Part One, you can find it here!)

The second thing that breaks my heart is when a Christian expresses zero desire to listen to or learn from black Americans in these tumultuous times. Some Christians really struggle to admit that they have something to learn about the grief of another people group—not one in a remote village or a far away country, but a group of neighbors in their own nation.

Just to be clear, when I say we need to learn from them, I don’t mean that we must agree with everything they say, condone everything they do, or submit to them as a complete authority. I mean that you can learn from someone just by listening to them and hearing about their experience. When was the last time we listened just to listen? Without an attitude of resentment or tuning someone out so we can plan our next rebuttal?

Perhaps more than ever before, right now it is crucial to listen and learn from our black neighbors. Right now black people are telling us that there’s still a problem. That there’s still racism. That it’s not always overt, but it’s still present. That there needs to be change. Maybe the protests just look senseless and angry to you, but I don’t believe that’s what Jesus sees. Maybe it seems like there’s too much gray area. Maybe you just want to avoid thinking about it or dealing with it, but I don’t think that’s what Jesus wants from his followers.

Jesus, who had all the answers and all knowledge and all wisdom—Jesus, who cried with Mary and Martha—Jesus, who saw the woman who had been caught in adultery and dragged out into public, and said, “Woman, where are your accusers? Neither do I condemn you. Go and sin no more”—Jesus, who could lay out all my flaws, all my selfishness, every evil thing I’ve ever thought or said or done—Jesus, who chooses to see past my angry mess to the person inside, whom He loves.

That Jesus. I think that Jesus looks down on the anger and the pain our country is feeling right now and I think His heart breaks. Not like “Oh my god, look at these idiots!” But because the selfishness of humanity has caused so much brokenness and because one shape that brokenness takes is racism. I think He looks down on those who are angry, crying, hurting, or downtrodden because of racism today and He cares. And He wants us to care too.

There are few things that feel better to me than feeling understood. And I feel most understood when someone takes the time to listen to me, ask me questions, and really try to get to know me. The simple act of talking with your black friends and neighbors during this time is invaluable. Have a conversation! Ask questions. Listen. I’ve heard more than once recently, “You can’t have a conversation with anyone these days,” but to me, that’s a cop out. If we paint the person we disagree with as unreasonable, extreme, or aggressive, we absolve ourselves of learning anything from them or even listening to them. And if we can’t even listen to our neighbor, why should they listen to us when we talk about Jesus, the gospel, or our faith?

I know it might feel difficult and awkward to have that kind of conversation. I’ll be honest. When someone I don’t like speaks or someone says something I disagree with, I often run away, ignore them, and generally distance myself from them. But how am I going to learn by doing that? How can we love someone better if we’re not willing to get to know them? How can we grow if we’re not willing to get uncomfortable? I encourage you to ask your black friends what their thoughts are during this time.

Let’s be real for a moment. Maybe some of us can’t think of a single black person in our lives who we feel we have a meaningful relationship with. We often shy away from making relationships with people who are different from us. I would venture to say, for many Christians, they don’t have a meaningful relationship with a single non-Christian. To be transparent, that was my reality for years, and I’m ashamed of it. Starting a new relationship or building on an existing one can be daunting, but it doesn’t have to be complicated. Ask questions. Listen. Learn. Grow.

We, as Christians, are the ones holding ourselves to a higher standard—to Jesus’s standard. May we step up and gain a reputation for being quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger, as James 1:19 instructs. May we be full of the unabashed love and truth of Jesus Christ.

As much as I want everyone to stop fighting, I know that’s not going to happen, and perhaps isn’t even 100% healthy. But in the midst of all the chaos, this is what God has been speaking to my heart in the still moments with Him. The solution to the problem of racism will never be found by denying, ignoring, or avoiding the issue. These are not going to calm down the climate, quiet those who are shouting, or eradicate racism. I believe the solution comes through compassion, humility, listening, learning, asking questions, and building authentic relationships. As Christ followers, one thing we can all agree on is that we must follow what Jesus taught and did, and if you look at Jesus’s life, you’ll see that He did all of these things.